We have an aversion to failure.
Quotes denying its existence are widespread.
“There is no failure, only feedback”.
“There is no failure, only learning”.
Even Thomas Edison is quoted, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
We give participation trophies.
We don’t keep score.
Yet, deep inside, we know when we’re disappointed in an outcome.
We know when we’ve tried hard for something and didn’t make it happen.
We know when we’ve failed.
Denying it invalidates these feelings.
Turning a blind eye to failure doesn’t make it any easier.
It makes it worse.
What if instead we accepted failure?
What if we embraced it?
What if we celebrated it?
What if we recognized that it’s not failure that’s the problem, but what we do with it?
What we take away from it?
What role we allow it to play in our story?
Failure is real.
There will be goals that you don’t achieve.
Sometimes, this won’t be your fault.
Often, it’ll be yours alone.
But failing means you showed up.
That’s no reason for shame.
What skills will you develop?
What will you learn?
How will you grow?
You will never be perfect.
But you will always be enough.
You will always be worthy.
Right now, as you are.
You can acknowledge your shortcomings.
You can say, “I want to improve”.
Loving yourself requires these.
You must know yourself to love yourself.
Yet you also must forgive yourself.
You will fail.
That’s part of what makes you, you.
You’ve got this.